The 5th Lost Rule of Network Marketing Success

Anders Gustavsson asked:

First of all, you must be very clear about your intentions in the conversation. As you begin talking to more people, you’ll find very quickly that most people LOVE to talk about themselves. If you are anything like most novice network marketers, your intentions are to try to recruit them as quickly as possible. This means you are most likely thinking about what to say next in your head, and not paying close enough attention to what your potential prospect is saying.

This is a very big mistake.

Here is where LISTENING will come to your aid. If you have difficulty listening to people, then you will also notice it is hard to build relationships.


The most important part of any conversation you have with someone regarding your business is what THEY have to say. Listen to their needs. Then you can decide how and where their lifestyle could benefit from an opportunity like the one you hope to offer. But not before you hear what they have to say.

Your intention should be to offer them an opportunity that is going to get them excited about solving a problem in their life. So you need to pay attention to them so you can find out what that is.

It is important that you learn how to customize your approach to each person, because everyone has different needs.

We have created a fun network marketing board game called MLM The Game. While playing MLM The Game you will be able to practice your listening skills. You will also be opened up to new ways to recruit and teach new distributors about network marketing.

While speaking to your prospects, the most important thing is that you get them talking about themselves, and that you are listening and genuinely interested in what they are saying. The more closely you listen to what people have to say, the more you will find out what is on their mind, and what is most important in their lives. There are 3 basic steps you ought to stick to when approaching a prospect:

Step 1) The initial layered conversation

Step 2) Piquing interest (specific open-ended question)

Step 3) The elevator speech

Step 1, The layered conversation, consists of getting to know what is important in a person’s life. Then, piquing their interest involves a more specific open-ended question that leads them to ask you what you are referring to. And lastly, your elevator speech is WHAT your business is, and what it has to offer them, stated in about 15-20 seconds.

Here is an example. Let’s say Bob has been talking to Mary for a few minutes and the conversation naturally leads to the following:


“I have been so busy at the office, running the kids back and forth to day care… I barely have enough time for myself to relax, much less sleep. Things are generally good; it’s just hard with the kids and all, you know? That is, with not having their father around. I really just want to spend more quality time with them, but I’ve got to pay those bills, if you know what I mean?”

Bob is brand new to this business so he says something like this:


“Yeah I do know what you mean Mary. Are you open to making some extra money, part time around your schedule, if it didn’t interfere with anything you are currently doing?”

Now, let’s break this down a little bit to clarify what just happened and why a better approach will increase the likelihood of Mary seeing the benefits of getting involved in Bob’s opportunity. Mary just told him that she barely has enough to time to herself, much less time to sleep. What on earth makes him think she could just “fit this around her schedule?” She has no room in her schedule! Sure, she wants to make more money, but that is not what she REALLY wants. If Bob had been listening, he would have noticed that she said “I really just want to spend more quality time with my kids.” THAT is HER Why.

She just gave Bob a key to understanding who she is and what is important to her. Bob might say “Tell me more about your kids.” Then she’ll most likely lovingly talk about the most important people in her life and be focused on that positive emotion.

Get it? Let’s give Bob another chance with a better approach.

After a few more layering questions Bob is ready for Step 2, and can now customize his approach to something similar to the following:


“Yes Mary, I do know what you mean. That sounds tough, being away from your kids all the time, especially with their father not around. Mary, I know this might sound a little crazy right now with your busy schedule and all, and this may or may not be for you, but if there was a way that you could spend more time with your kids, still pay the bills, and possibly match or surpass your current income, how interested would you be in learning about it?”

At this point Mary is most likely not going to just say “No” and if she does, Bob probably doesn’t want to continue pursuing her anyway. She has a whole other set of dialogue to address. He basically just described to her the most ideal situation she could hope for. At this point, Mary is likely open to hearing Bob’s take on how she can accomplish this.

If she is a good prospect, she may say something like this:

“Well sure, very interested! That would be wonderful, what did you have in mind?”

This is the magical place you want all of your prospects to be in; an open and hopeful mind towards what you have to say next.

Bob can now proceed to Step 3, The elevator speech.


“Well Mary, I have recently teamed up with some people who are leading the expansion of a very successful company in this area, and they have excellent training available, with a very flexible schedule. Like I said before, this may or may not be for you, but when you described to me how busy you are and how you need more time with your kids, I felt obligated to tell you that there are many people with your similar situation having tremendous success in this business. What would be your interest in learning more?”

Thereafter, it is important not to share too much more. Keep it very short, describe the products benefits, and your Why. Bob is most likely going to get much better results with this approach.

Be sure to craft your elevator speech so it fits your personality. Be genuine with your elevator speech, don’t just copy someone else’s. You’ll notice this one is customized for what Mary has told Bob, and more generic in nature than what yours will be.

If Mary has any interest in changing her situation, then she will respond positively.

At this point in the recruiting process, your company should have tools for the next stage of this interaction. Many companies have informational DVD’s, some like to do recorded phone calls, or maybe you can refer your prospect to the website. Whatever tools you use, make sure they are exposed to this information as soon as possible. People’s lives are busy, and they will lose interest unless you act quickly. From this point on it is all about getting your prospect exposed to the presentation.

Website content

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *