dhlim88 asked:
How to manage your relationship conflicts with your ex love partner for a successful making up relationship instantly?
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Dealing with Conflict
People have varying degrees of comfort with conflict. Some prefer avoiding it at all costs. Unfortunately, those costs tend to increase the longer issues are left unaddressed. Therefore, learning how to manage and resolve conflict is to your benefit. When dealing with conflict:
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Treat it as normal and expected. Conflict need not be catastrophic or personal. Conflict is simply part of being human. Deal with issues as they arise. Avoiding conflict makes situations worse. Time does not resolve matters. Instead, it decreases the chance of a positive outcome. Attempt to understand the other person’s point of view. Dismissing the other’s views, assigning blame, and exclusive focus on your own perspective are all counterproductive. Don’t judge emotions. No one’s feelings are more or less “right†than the others. Emotions reflect a valid perspective of an individual. Even if you don’t understand it, acknowledge the other person’s reaction as important.
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Focus on the behaviour, situation or problem area without attacking the person involved. Do not assume your values or beliefs are “right.†They reflect a view of the world from your unique perspective. Respecting another’s viewpoint as equally valuable opens an opportunity for learning and growth. Dealing with conflict does not need to be dreaded or feared. Interpersonal conflict is a natural component of human interaction. In fact, if the problem is the object of focus versus the people involved, disagreements can generate new ideas and growth. Dealing with issues as they occur, acknowledging the other party’s feelings and perspective, and avoiding judgment or blame further increase the chance of productive conflict resolution.
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 Conflict Resolution
When someone does something we do not like, we tend to focus on what they did wrong. We judge. We criticize. We point out what we deem to be their faults. The person, in turn, feels hurt or angry. The conflict escalates and distance occurs. If conflict resolution is your goal, this is not the way to go about it.
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Conflict in relationships does not have to follow the above scenario. A common mistake is made by thinking blame needs to be assigned to someone. You do not have to prove who did what wrong. This is a lose – lose way to approach interpersonal conflict.
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Instead, the way to deal with conflict in relationships is to express your reaction without blaming it on the other person. Focus on what you thought, how you felt, what happened from your perspective. You are not to make assumptions about why the person did what they did. You are not to hand over responsibility for your emotions, reactions, fears, behaviours, etc. Simply provide an explanation of your experience.
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The other person then has the opportunity to respond to your concerns – instead of having to defend him/her from your accusations. The quickest way to deal with conflict is to avoid blame or judgment. Simply explain your experience to your partner. Your goal is to share your emotions and worries, not to decide who is bad. Challenge yourself to not view your partner’s behaviour as “wrong.†While it may be displeasing to you, this does not make one person right and the other one wrong. Furthermore, he/she is not responsible for your reaction. Your feelings are important and should be communicated in this way so your partner can hear you.
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He/she may not give you a great response at first. A defensive reaction is normal, not a sign the person does not care. Do not give up or fall into old patterns of arguing. Instead, repeat this process until he/she hears you. Indeed, life is short. Don’t let another day go by without taking a chance on happiness. You will never know until you try, so remember to make a move today. It can change or affect the rest of your life, therefore, at the very least, you can try to come out something for your ex love partner during your weekend plans. With a little practice, perseverance and patience, I believe that your relationship could be enhanced with the tips that I have shared earlier. If you have faced any problems with your loved ones, do not hesitate to visit this piece of article again.
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I really have a strong belief that if you can understand what I have explained and applied what you have learnt from this piece of article, your problems can be eventually solved and your making up relationship can become more stable and stronger. I wish all the best for your making up relationship with your partner. Do always remember to spread word of mouth to your fellow friends for supporting the decision of having making up than breaking up.
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You will also learn how to reverse the situation if you have already done those things that should NEVER be done.
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