JOSEPH ENE asked:
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Life is full of challenges, and the marriage institution is not without its fair share of them. Every time we go through tough times, we have the opportunity of turning them around for our good or letting them ruin our lives. Whether they will end up for our good or not depends on our ability to handle such difficult situations.
The issue of In-Laws is one that many women wish did not exist in marriage. This is because it has proven to be the bane of many ailing marriages. Many wives have identified their in-laws as the only area in their marriage into which they have not been able to bring peace and harmony.
Yet the truth is that when two people get married they do not marry each other alone, but their families as well. There is no way, no matter how much we wish, that we could obliterate the family members of our spouses. Thus, it is of paramount importance that we seek to maintain peace and harmony with our in-laws no matter how difficult the case may be.
The relationship with in-laws is a sensitive one; one need to know how to handle it without rupturing it. The following are practical tips for resolution of conflicts with In-Laws:
• Look inwards: It is always better to check oneself anytime there are issues to be cleared with in-Laws. Often spouses fail to do this and hence are blind to obvious faults on their parts. It is important to know that in-laws are genuinely interested in the welfare of their son or daughter, hence spouses should treat each other well to prevent the raising of eye brows by the other party’s relatives.
• We must understand that the complaints of In-laws are borne out of genuine care and concern most of the time. Even though they are overbearing, the truth is that they are most likely expressing fear. Efforts should me made to be slow to attack every criticism, and to see it from the perspective of the person expressing it.
• It is the husband’s role to lead every conflict resolution involving in-laws, because he his the head of the home. The wife should suspend every issue in the absence of her husband, so as to give him the opportunity to fulfill his God given role.
If you wish to have a blissful home, you need the wisdom, which comes from above to handle issues in your relationships. Therefore, in-laws should be seen as a growing point and not a groaning point.